Saturday, October 29, 2011

Halloween Costume

Amy: Are you dressing up for Halloween?

Cory: Yeah, perhaps as Tobias Funke.

Amy: So you're just going to drink lots of apple juice and dress up as Byo Ping-Ping?

Cory: ...what...?

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Pylenol

When discussing the poles used to test parallel parking on a road test with my mom:

Amy: They're not called poles, Mom. They're called Tylenols.

Mom: HAHAHAHA! WHAT?!

Amy: No, I meant pylenols. They're pylenols.

Mom: I don't know what a pylenol is, but I'm sure that they use poles for parallel parking.

Amy: Nope. Pylenols.

Mom: ...Do you mean...pylons?

Amy: Same thing.

Generation Gap

Amy was going out to eat wings with a friend, and she invited me. Overhearing this, my mom piped in.

Mom: Wings?! I've been craving wings! I want to come!

Amy: You can't come.

Me: Hahaha, I'm only going to go if Mom comes along. We can make it a family thing.

Amy: No.

Mom: What? Why not?

Amy: 'Cause you're old.

Me: So what? Wings are wings. Heck, let's invite Grandma, too!

Mom: Yeah! We'll have three generations going out for wings!

Amy: No, that would only be two generations.

Mom: Huh?

Me: How do you figure that?

Amy: Because you and me are one generation, and Mom and Grandma would be another generation.

Me: You have no idea how generations work, do you?

Amy: Yeah, I do. We're young, and they're old.

Me: So Mom and Grandma are in the same generation, then?

Amy: Yeah, 'cause they both have grey hairs.

Me: So when you get old and get grey hair, you'll be in the same generation as Grandma?

Amy: No, Grandma will be in the dead generation by then.

Surname

Amy: Mom, think about this: we have the same last name. Isn't that crazy?! Like, how many last names are out there, right? And I was born with the same last name as you and Dad. Isn't that a crazy coincidence!

Mom: ...

Amy: No! Think about it! There's SO many last names! And we ended up having the same one. Crazy.

Pep Squab

Amy (on the topic of feminine health): Yeah, I never had one of those things that girls are supposed to have? What are they called? Oh, yeah! Pep Squabs!

Me: What?

Amy: Pep squabs! It's like the girl version of 'dinky problems.'

Me: Are you serious right now?

Amy: Well, what are they called then? Pep squabs....pep swabs...papp squab...pep squibs! No, it's pep squabs. Right? Girls get their peps squabbed or something. I don't really know how it works, though.