Listening to country music, Amy states: "Nashville, Tennessee is the only place in Texix (Texas) that I know of."
Asked what state Los Angeles is in, Amy answers: "North America."
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Next of Kin
When discussing wills, I brought up the term "next of kin."
Amy: Nexican?
Me: Next of kin.
Amy: Nexican...? You mean "Mexican," right?
Me: No. Next. Of. Kin.
Amy (bursting out laughing): MOM! Cory can't say "Mexican" properly! He says it starts with a "n!" Nexican!
Me: No. Next. Of. Kin. Like my children would be my next of kin.
Amy: Are you going to marry a Mexican girl?
Me: No! Not "Mexican!"
Amy: Then how are you going to have Mexican children? I mean "Nexican!" HAHAHAHA! You can't say it right! And you call me dumb!
Me: This has nothing to do with Mexicans. It's "next of kin." Three words. Next.
Amy: Yeah.
Me: Of.
Amy: Yeah.
Me: Kin.
Amy: Kin? That's not a real word. Stop trying to cover up that you couldn't say "Mexican" right. You're just embarrassed.
Amy: Nexican?
Me: Next of kin.
Amy: Nexican...? You mean "Mexican," right?
Me: No. Next. Of. Kin.
Amy (bursting out laughing): MOM! Cory can't say "Mexican" properly! He says it starts with a "n!" Nexican!
Me: No. Next. Of. Kin. Like my children would be my next of kin.
Amy: Are you going to marry a Mexican girl?
Me: No! Not "Mexican!"
Amy: Then how are you going to have Mexican children? I mean "Nexican!" HAHAHAHA! You can't say it right! And you call me dumb!
Me: This has nothing to do with Mexicans. It's "next of kin." Three words. Next.
Amy: Yeah.
Me: Of.
Amy: Yeah.
Me: Kin.
Amy: Kin? That's not a real word. Stop trying to cover up that you couldn't say "Mexican" right. You're just embarrassed.
Banks
Amy (to my Mom): Mom, I want to change banks.
Mom: Why?
Amy: 'Cause all my friends use a different one, and they get more money from it. And I want to be at the same bank as my friends.
Mom: Which bank do they use?
Amy: Uhhh...it's called the "ATM" bank.
Mom: Why?
Amy: 'Cause all my friends use a different one, and they get more money from it. And I want to be at the same bank as my friends.
Mom: Which bank do they use?
Amy: Uhhh...it's called the "ATM" bank.
Tobogganing is VERY fun
Amy told me this story recently.
"I can't go tobogganing anymore. It's too fun. When I was a kid, every time I went tobogganing, I peed myself. I'd be going down the hill, and it'd be so much fun, and I'd be laughing like crazy, then I'd stop at the bottom, but I'd just keep laughing 'cause it was so much fun, and I'd laugh so hard that I'd pee my pants. Sometimes, there'd even be steam 'cause the pee was so hot. We'd always have to go home after I went down once because I needed to change, so I would stop telling Mom and Dad that I peed, just so I could keep sledding 'cause it was so much fun until the pee stopped being warm and it was just wet. I still do that even today. If I go tobogganing even with my friends, I go down once and I sit and laugh like crazy at the bottom until I pee myself and we have to go home. They don't care. They just know I do that. 'Cause it's too much fun. Need a diaper. Every time."
"I can't go tobogganing anymore. It's too fun. When I was a kid, every time I went tobogganing, I peed myself. I'd be going down the hill, and it'd be so much fun, and I'd be laughing like crazy, then I'd stop at the bottom, but I'd just keep laughing 'cause it was so much fun, and I'd laugh so hard that I'd pee my pants. Sometimes, there'd even be steam 'cause the pee was so hot. We'd always have to go home after I went down once because I needed to change, so I would stop telling Mom and Dad that I peed, just so I could keep sledding 'cause it was so much fun until the pee stopped being warm and it was just wet. I still do that even today. If I go tobogganing even with my friends, I go down once and I sit and laugh like crazy at the bottom until I pee myself and we have to go home. They don't care. They just know I do that. 'Cause it's too much fun. Need a diaper. Every time."
Vasectomies
Amy, on the topic of pregancies:
"Can't guys stop getting pregnant? Like, don't they "rederm" their sperm thing, so they can't get pregnant?
"Can't guys stop getting pregnant? Like, don't they "rederm" their sperm thing, so they can't get pregnant?
No Idea About This One
Amy (out of no where): I want an... "allowance." No, I mean a... "alliluance." Umm...no, a....what's-it-called? A...a "lion's esses." ARGH! Do you know what I mean?! Like, Justin Bieber has one!
(We never figured out what she was talking about with this one.)
(We never figured out what she was talking about with this one.)
Amy's Accents
While watching the American Country Music Awards, Amy looks over and my mom and me.
Amy: When I grow up, I want a Nashville boy. So he can be all: (in a terrible Australian accent) "G'day, mate!"
My Mom and I: ....
Amy: No, wait! I mean: (in the same accent) "G'day Mate!" No! I mean: (in a poor British accent) "G'day, Mate!" NO! WAIT, I CAN DO THIS! (in a normal voice) "Good. Day. Mate." NO! WAIT! (in a super-high Australian accent) "G'daaaaayyy, maaate!"
Me: ...None of those were even close. And you might want to try "Howdy, partner" since "g'day, mate" is an Australian greeting.
Amy: Never mind, then. But you guys know what I mean, right?
Amy: When I grow up, I want a Nashville boy. So he can be all: (in a terrible Australian accent) "G'day, mate!"
My Mom and I: ....
Amy: No, wait! I mean: (in the same accent) "G'day Mate!" No! I mean: (in a poor British accent) "G'day, Mate!" NO! WAIT, I CAN DO THIS! (in a normal voice) "Good. Day. Mate." NO! WAIT! (in a super-high Australian accent) "G'daaaaayyy, maaate!"
Me: ...None of those were even close. And you might want to try "Howdy, partner" since "g'day, mate" is an Australian greeting.
Amy: Never mind, then. But you guys know what I mean, right?
More Geography
Here are a few things Amy stated regarding geography:
"Alberta seems bigger than Winnipeg, doesn't it? How does that work?"
Me: How many states are there in the United States?
Amy: I don't know, but Canada has less continents than the US. TWENTY-SEVEN, RIGHT?! Why do I always think 27...? Is it more?
Me: Canada doesn't have continents. It has provinces.
Amy: Oh, yeah.
Amy: Is Calgary a city? 'Cause I thought Edmonton was a city...
Me: They're both cities.
Amy: YOU CAN HAVE TWO CITIES IN ONE PROVINCE?!
Amy's break down of the "countries" on our continent:
Canada
North America
Mexico City
(she also said this after the list: "Hang on, isn't Mexico City part of North America? Then is Mexico City a state, or a continent?)
"Alberta seems bigger than Winnipeg, doesn't it? How does that work?"
Me: How many states are there in the United States?
Amy: I don't know, but Canada has less continents than the US. TWENTY-SEVEN, RIGHT?! Why do I always think 27...? Is it more?
Me: Canada doesn't have continents. It has provinces.
Amy: Oh, yeah.
Amy: Is Calgary a city? 'Cause I thought Edmonton was a city...
Me: They're both cities.
Amy: YOU CAN HAVE TWO CITIES IN ONE PROVINCE?!
Amy's break down of the "countries" on our continent:
Canada
North America
Mexico City
(she also said this after the list: "Hang on, isn't Mexico City part of North America? Then is Mexico City a state, or a continent?)
"Geology"
Amy brings up how much she enjoys "geology" class. After describing how much she understands about where countries are, I correct her and say that she enjoys "geography." She brushes off the correction and begins to say some very inaccurate statements regarding geography. I decided to ask her to draw me a map of the world. The end result was this:
Here are the highlights of the progression:
She began with North America. After drawing the rough outline, she started Canada. Since we do live here, she got a good portion of that correct. Then she moved on to the USA. After jotting in Tennessee, Texas (pronounced "Texix), LA, and Pittsburgh, she drew Europe and placed London, Paris, and the UK.
Next was Australia and New Zealand. For some reason she placed Burnaby there instead of in British Columbia. Why Burnaby? Beats me.
Now, at this point, she drew a blank. I urged her on to try and name all the continents. She said she didn't know. I asked her how many continents there were. She replied with, "Well, more than this...TWENTY-SEVEN!"
I decided to have her fill out the US a bit more. I asked her where New York was. She said, "it's in L.A." Just before she drew a dot for it, she corrected herself with, "No! Wait! It's attached to L.A.! I don't know if it's on top or underneath, though, so I'm just going to draw it here."
She suddenly remembered Florida. She drew it on the west coast before scratching it out and placing it on an island. Also, Florida and Alaska are two terms for the same place, she said.
I asked her about Asia, and she said, "Oh, yeah. Somewhere under Europe here. It's not that big, though, 'cause not many people live there." (???)
Then I said, "If we live in North America, isn't there a similar continent somewhere?" She didn't understad my hint, so I said, "Ok, where's South America?" She drew the land mass below North America, then an epiphany hit her: "THAT'S WHERE AFRICA IS! I CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT AFRICA!"
I asked about Antarctica. She said, "don't we live in Antarctica?" and shaded in the southern Canadian prairies. She thought for a second, and said, "No, it's probably higher up over here."
Around this point, I asked, "Is there any other places in the world?"
Amy replied, "No, these are all the places people live or visit."
She spent a couple more minutes writing in a few other places before stopping.
Here are the highlights of the progression:
She began with North America. After drawing the rough outline, she started Canada. Since we do live here, she got a good portion of that correct. Then she moved on to the USA. After jotting in Tennessee, Texas (pronounced "Texix), LA, and Pittsburgh, she drew Europe and placed London, Paris, and the UK.
Next was Australia and New Zealand. For some reason she placed Burnaby there instead of in British Columbia. Why Burnaby? Beats me.
Now, at this point, she drew a blank. I urged her on to try and name all the continents. She said she didn't know. I asked her how many continents there were. She replied with, "Well, more than this...TWENTY-SEVEN!"
I decided to have her fill out the US a bit more. I asked her where New York was. She said, "it's in L.A." Just before she drew a dot for it, she corrected herself with, "No! Wait! It's attached to L.A.! I don't know if it's on top or underneath, though, so I'm just going to draw it here."
She suddenly remembered Florida. She drew it on the west coast before scratching it out and placing it on an island. Also, Florida and Alaska are two terms for the same place, she said.
I asked her about Asia, and she said, "Oh, yeah. Somewhere under Europe here. It's not that big, though, 'cause not many people live there." (???)
Then I said, "If we live in North America, isn't there a similar continent somewhere?" She didn't understad my hint, so I said, "Ok, where's South America?" She drew the land mass below North America, then an epiphany hit her: "THAT'S WHERE AFRICA IS! I CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT AFRICA!"
I asked about Antarctica. She said, "don't we live in Antarctica?" and shaded in the southern Canadian prairies. She thought for a second, and said, "No, it's probably higher up over here."
Around this point, I asked, "Is there any other places in the world?"
Amy replied, "No, these are all the places people live or visit."
She spent a couple more minutes writing in a few other places before stopping.
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